After A Long Pause… Life in 2020

After my wife Holly died in 2014, I had hoped to continue writing and maintain the continuity of the healing work to which we had dedicated our lives for 15 years. But embracing grief after losing someone you built a life with becomes a humbling new journey. That grief has a will and heart of its own that demands that you stop and breathe, and listen. Over and over and over again. A vulnerable new life is forming, unknown at first, and one’s mind must become open to feeling a tentative pulse of life taking form inside mysterious places of the heart and soul.

When the momentum of a dynamic relationship comes to an end, there is a kind of shock that takes over—all of the dreams, visions, and goals that are left incomplete between you dissipate like mist in the sun. The theater set of a shared life remains while the play is over, the intensity of a torturous cancer journey suddenly still, too still. Too still.

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Starting The Soul’s Journey Anew

It has been a little over six months since Holly passed away peacefully, bathed in the golden glow of the midday sun that filled her room and held all of us there in the quiet awe that one can only feel in the presence of the sacred.

I have experienced sacred consciousness and manifestation quite a few times, in a variety of forms: healing miracles in my own body as a boy, sacred sexual orgasm with lovers, sacred light in sessions with clients, the Red Tara Initiation I undertook in 1986 with Chagdud Tulku Rinpoche and the death transition of beloved animals into the spirit realm are a few examples. Each was amazing, each was humbling and each came and went in its own time, leaving me back in the more mundane levels of life.

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